The Funeral

Today is Mom’s funeral.  I woke at 8:00a and begin to ready myself.  Roy has already left work and is making a quick stop to clean up the jeep.  I wake Aaron to shower and then slowly rouse Wolfie and Drew.  By 9:00a we are all ready to go and just waiting for Candice’s arrival.  By 9:15a we are out the door and on the way.  Aaron and Candice are taking their car.  Roy Jr and Corey are coming together shortly in Corey’s car.

We arrive at the funeral home and Brenda and her family are already there and waiting.  Brenda offers a long embrace and quietly reassures me that she and Erica will be in no hurry to disburse anything, we can take all the time I need.  I cry in relief.  Because I work in a law firm, I have an attorney free of charge. I'm well aware that I can drag this probate out as long as I need; however, I would like to refrain from handling it in that manner. I would like for my sisters and I to get along, be more understanding, considerate, and patient with each other.  Erica and her family arrive and she comes in for a hug as well.  Bygones again without a formal apology?  Okay, happy to.

We are advised by Mike that we are “breaking tradition” by standing in the foyer to greet people and usher ourselves to our seats.  My sisters and I, along with our husbands, all sit in the first row.  Brenda’s and Erica’s kids sit in the row just behind us and my crew sits behind them.

Pastor Shamburger begins and he reiterates, with only a few mistakes, some of the information provided him by me and my sisters.  He then simply reads the obituary word for word.  Our cousin, Ron, makes his speech which seems to focus more on his life but does include a memory of when my mother and father dated.  Overall, I felt the speeches were lame and the Pastor would have done better to preach something more from his Bible rather than trying to be so personal about someone he knew nothing of.  The music reminded me of what we’d been listening to in mom’s hospital room with the additions of “Surround Me with Love” and “I Can Only Imagine”.  Erica’s daughters begin to sob and it was all I could do to keep from crying myself.  Drew follows suit though and sheds some quiet tears.

We are ushered outside and into our cars for the procession.  The hearse, then Brenda’s vehicle, then our Jeep, then Corey’s mustang, then Erica’s Suburban, and Aaron’s car.  I try to distract Drew by pointing out our police escort and explaining how they are assisting us.

The weather is very overcast as we gather at the grave site.  Sitting directly in front of the casket is difficult and I choke back more tears.  Aunt Jeanette and Aunt Carolyn sit behind me and Aunt Carolyn is having an especially difficult time as she was not just mom's younger sister, but her best friend as well.  Erica seats more elderly under the tent giving up her own and then everyone else moves in closely as Pastor Shamburger says a few more words.

We disburse and mingle for a bit before the rain begins sprinkling.  Erica and Brenda and their families plan to eat out and pick Tokyo Grill inviting me and mine.  Aaron, Corey, and Candice inform me that the restaurant is quite pricey and that, in conjunction with how picky we all are, I decide to pass on the invite. Our family makes our way to Texas Roadhouse for our dinner and it's enjoyable.

The day is done and I have yet to process mom's death.